How Your Brain Keeps You Stuck (and How to Overcome It)
Have you ever set a goal—like waking up early to exercise or sticking to a budget—and found yourself suddenly filled with resistance when it’s time to follow through? You might think it’s just a lack of motivation or willpower, but what’s really going on is much sneakier: your brain is working against you, trying to keep you stuck.
This concept comes from a podcast episode titled The Sneaky Way Your Brain Keeps You Stuck (and What to Do About It) by Lindsay Dotzlaf. In it, she explains how our brains try to protect us by conserving energy and keeping us in our comfort zones. Let’s dive into how this works, how it applies to money, and, most importantly, what you can do about it.
How Your Brain Tries to Keep You Safe
Our brains are wired to keep us safe. This is helpful if we are in a survival situation where danger lurks around every corner—like a wild animal jumping out at us. But for most of us today, safety doesn’t require avoiding animals, it’s all about avoiding discomfort and conserving energy. And growth? Growth feels risky. It takes effort, and it feels uncomfortable.
When we decide we want to make a change—whether it’s waking up early to exercise, eating healthier, or sticking to a budget—the brain doesn’t automatically cheer us on. Instead, it often plays dirty, giving us all kinds of reasons why we shouldn’t follow through with the plan.
Take the example of trying to get up early to go to the gym. The plan sounds great when we’re lying in bed at night, right? But when the alarm goes off, suddenly the brain kicks in, reminding us of all the times we’ve tried this before and failed. It might tell us, "You didn’t sleep very well last night. You’re trying to get healthy, but sleep is important too. The healthy thing to do is to go back to sleep."
It doesn’t sound like a bad argument, right? And it feels true in the moment. But here’s the thing: your brain isn’t trying to sabotage you. It’s just trying to keep you safe. It feels safer in the familiar, even if that familiar situation isn’t ideal. Whether it’s being overweight, stuck in a cycle of emotional spending, or living paycheck to paycheck, your brain wants to stay in what’s known—no matter how uncomfortable it may be.
The Battle Between Your Brain’s Parts
This tug-of-war happens between two parts of your brain: the prefrontal cortex and the amygdala.
The Prefrontal Cortex: This is the part of the brain responsible for planning, decision-making, and thinking about long-term goals. It’s where your best intentions come from—your decision to go to the gym or stick to your financial goals.
The Amygdala: This part of the brain is all about survival. It craves instant gratification and prioritizes feelings of comfort, even if they aren’t the healthiest. This is the part of your brain that whispers, “Stay in bed,” or “You deserve that impulse purchase,” or “You can just do it tomorrow.”
The prefrontal cortex makes plans with your long-term health in mind, while the amygdala wants to keep you in the status quo, avoiding discomfort and effort. When you experience resistance, it’s likely the amygdala doing its job—keeping you stuck in what feels safe.
How This Applies to Money
When it comes to money, your brain does the same thing. You might want to save, pay off debt, or stick to a budget, but your amygdala is the one making a case for impulse spending. It might tell you things like, “You deserve this treat,” or “It’s not that big of a deal,” even though your long-term goals say otherwise.
The truth is, financial growth involves a lot of emotional discomfort. Whether it’s feeling anxious about cutting back on spending, dealing with guilt over past financial mistakes, or the frustration of not seeing immediate results, your brain isn’t going to give you an easy path to success. It’s going to keep giving you excuses to stay comfortable—whether that’s overspending, ignoring your budget, or avoiding tough financial conversations.
Practical Steps to Overcome It
Acknowledge the Resistance: The first step to overcoming this brain pattern is simply recognizing it. When you feel resistance to following through on your goals—whether it’s waking up for your workout or sticking to your budget—just acknowledge, “Oh, this is just my brain playing dirty.” Recognizing it for what it is can take away some of its power.
Separate Your Brain from Your Intentions: Remember that your brain’s resistance isn’t you. It’s just a survival mechanism trying to keep you safe. Your prefrontal cortex has your long-term goals in mind. Stay connected to that part of your brain and know that it’s stronger than the short-term desires of your amygdala.
Make Small Wins Your Focus: Focus on small, achievable wins. For example, instead of stressing over a massive financial goal, celebrate when you manage to stick to a budget for the week. Small wins give you the momentum to push through bigger goals.
Use Accountability to Your Advantage: When it comes to money, having someone—like a coach—can make a huge difference. A coach helps you stay on track when your brain tries to talk you out of it. They can help you work through the emotional barriers that prevent you from following through. And when it comes to emotional spending or sticking to your financial plan, coaching is incredibly powerful. It’s the extra push you need to make sure your brain isn’t keeping you stuck.
How Coaching Helps You Break Free
Coaching is a powerful tool for navigating the mental resistance that comes with growth. A coach isn’t just there to give you financial advice; they help you identify and overcome the subconscious patterns that keep you stuck. They help you recognize the stories you’re telling yourself—like "I can’t stick to a budget," or "I don’t deserve to save"—and work with you to rewrite those stories.
Coaching helps you build awareness and transform the way you think about money. It also provides you with the tools to reframe your thoughts when your brain tries to sabotage your progress. You won’t just be working on your finances; you’ll be working on your mindset too. And that combination is what leads to lasting change.
Conclusion
Your brain is a powerful ally, but it can also be a tricky opponent when it comes to personal growth. Whether you’re trying to get healthier, manage your money better, or break free from old habits, understanding how your brain works is the first step. With the right strategies, and with the support of a coach, you can break through that resistance and create lasting change. Your future self will thank you for it.